We are Wellington | The importance of developing character

Felix Zhang and his wife Kiki Chai are Wellington College founding parents whose son Paul has been with us from Nursery to his current place in year 4. In our expanding We are Wellington series, we ask our wider Wellington community – staff members, parents and pupils – to share their memories and experiences of the College to explore what makes Wellington special to them. As part of the series, Felix shares their familiy's experiences at Wellington.

Deciding on Wellington

Like a lot of parents, what attracted me to Wellington more than anything else was its educational ethos. Very quickly I saw that the College had a clear vision for how it wanted to prepare its pupils for life, not just for studying. There was a lot of focus on instilling values and developing each child’s character as well as their base of knowledge and academic abilities. For me, this is what every child needs; they need to come to a place to learn how to become a person as well as a pupil. I wanted my son to learn how to act responsibly so I needed to know that he would be learning from his teachers, peers and his educational environment to have good manners and a respectful attitude. This is what led me to believe that Wellington was the right school for Paul. Early impressions I remember noticing almost immediately how even quite young pupils here hold the door open for adults. While on the surface that may seem like a small thing, it’s important because it is indicative of the wider theme of how these children are growing up with a respectful and positive attitude. I remember thinking that it was reassuring to see little signs early on that the Wellington Values are actually a real thing here, and not just a pretty-sounding phrase on paper. More than anything I remember driving Paul to school each morning, as I witnessed the whole process of him settling in. During the first three months, he cried a lot, but that was to be expected from a child getting used to nursery and being away from his family during the day. Before long, the crying stopped and was quickly replaced with him chatting excitedly about how he is looking forward to his day at school, to seeing his friends and teachers, and wondering about what he would learn that day. As you can imagine, this was the best indicator for me that the College was the best place for him to be.

Hitting his stride

Over the years, I’ve seen my son’s character develop in a lot of positive ways. I think that his engagement with sport and the house system is a particularly good example. Paul was not sporty and used to be a little on the shy side, but his confidence seems to have grown each year and now he is very enthusiastic about competitive sport. I believe that the house system was a significant factor here. Paul quickly took to the idea of belonging to his house, The Wellesley, to trying hard on behalf of his house to get house points and win competitions, and I think his healthy sense of competitive spirit stems from that. This in turn led him to playing football last term, along with many of his friends. He started playing in weekend football classes, and participated in football and swimming trials during the whole-school sports try-outs held at the beginning of this academic year. He was then accepted for one of the football teams, which was such an encouraging outcome. I really feel it’s great that even this early on in his learning of the sport, when his skills are at the beginner level, the College has provided him with the chance to play competitively as part of a team. He’s now more enthusiastic, wanting to become a better player because he has a team to contribute to. That’s what is most important – not necessarily the recognition of talent and attainment of skills, but the understanding of life lessons like: being part of a team, doing your best and committing to something bigger than yourself. These are the things I want my son to take away from his school days.

A sense of community

Another source of character development for Wellington pupils is becoming part of a strong community. As a founding parent, I have seen that the community strengthens its bonds each year, even as the College grows. It’s a well-known challenge, being able to stay true to what makes a place special even as, by necessity, it grows and changes. This is why I think the Friends of Wellington parent group is very important to the College, as it does a great job of building up the community and keeping it inclusive. I joined the FoW last year as its head of communication, where I administrate WeChat groups and help with event communications and tasks of this nature. What is so heartening to see is how everyone in the FoW willingly makes time for their role. We all love Wellington, we share the same vision and passion for the College and every year there are new parents wanting to join in. This is what Wellington is all about: welcoming everyone and encouraging them to share their experience and abilities to make things better. There is never any shortage of commitment, and that’s something that hasn’t changed since I’ve been here. There are always parents who want to share their time and expertise not just for the big calendar events but also for the day-to-day smaller improvements we want to make. I cannot think of a better example for our children to witness. Of all the year’s events, the Summer Festival is my personal favourite, along with the Annual Ball as a close second. They are huge undertakings that are difficult to pull off but they always come together in such a polished and professional manner. Most importantly, at the Summer Festival you get to see the entire community coming together, enjoying themselves freely. It’s a special time where we collectively celebrate our close ties and our achievements. I have so many good memories of these events and I know Paul does as well.  

Looking ahead

Wellington’s inherent strength is how its teachers help our children understand how to live by the values that we all agree are essential. Alongside their academic educations, they support our children to develop their character, their mental fortitude and their emotional wellbeing. As I have said, Paul was a little bit shy but now he is very open, he is always smiling, willing to talk and try new things. He is ready to explore life confidently and for me that is the best preparation a child can have.

More relevant articles :

• We are Wellington | From the beginning
• We are Wellington | Anna Varina, a dual perspective
• We are Wellington | From Tianjin to Shanghai